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I am a writer. I appreciate grammar. I love Batman. I once convinced myself there was a dead body in the dumpster at work. I wish animals could talk. I adopted my dog partly because his name is Frank, the name of my novel's protagonist. I crave snow cones. I dream insane dreams and remember them for days, weeks, months, years. I wish I could record my dreams as films and share them with others. I am scared of spiders. I like to clean. I love high heels.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Beyond the Windshield



 I sang in the car today - about people who cannot drive. I was in a GREAT mood - leaving the school parking lot. Between the people who park and sit all morning for no reason and the people who just pull out and drive around, in and out of lanes, without ever looking at a mirror or window....I determined some people just cannot drive. So I started to sing about "some people can't drive..." and I started to get really negative.

Anyone who has ridden with me know - I cannot deal with bad drivers and put me at a red light for more than 2 seconds and I'm borderline to insane with impatience.

 I realized my mood was dampening due to these PEOPLE. And I CHOSE to note let that happen. Because honestly - it is out of my control that the Department of Public Safety/DMV of Texas hands out drivers licenses like fliers to a windshield in the Target parking lot - without discretion. That is beyond my control. All I can control is my behavior. So I should focus on MY driving....not shoot death glares at the woman in the 2013 Infiniti.

Isn't that pretty much Life, though? Sometimes we get so caught up in getting angry with people for being ignorant or willfully stupid - we forget to pay attention to the things we can control. All we can do is focus on our actions and just WATCH OUT for those who don't pay attention. But it goes beyond that as well....sometimes we resent others' successes because we are not where we want to be. It's natural - but we can control it.

I struggled with this a lot in my life. I still do from time to time. I backslide into a "victim" mentality sometimes. "Victor/Victim" is the principle of whether we will choose to behave "above the line" or "below the line." A Victor is positive and proactive. Responsible,optimistic, takes ownership for his or her actions. A visionary - to see the big picture and identify the steps it takes to get there. Achieves excellence. That's a Victor - an everyday champion. A Victim is one who blames others and makes excuses. Seeping in denial and focused on the "win/lose" result and not on the lessons learned during the "game." Scarcity mentality - an emotional pit. And honestly, it's almost natural for us to be in the Victim mentality. As in human nature....or society brings that on. From what I can tell it takes work for most people to hold their shoulders back and be that Champion/Victor. When we let our guard down, we can default back to Victim.

And I do it. You do it. We all do it.

The trick is to be aware of it and identify whether or not we are living above the line or below the line. Today? I started to drift below the line. But I noticed it - corrected it.

Sometimes we covet what others have - we know it is wrong, but sometimes we do it. And sometimes we get angry over others' mistakes. What I would like you to do today - is identify those triggers that occur beyond your windshield - that are simply out of your control. Are you focused on them? Do they dampen your spirit? Do they anger you? Do you resent another's success? Let them go. Be cautious - be on the lookout for them. But focus your energy on what you CAN control.

My favorite saying is something like, "Don't worry about the things you cannot change. And if you can change it, stop worrying and change it."


2 comments:

  1. This is a great post, Brittany. I am one of those who gets impatient with bad drivers, too, and really, in the whole grand scheme of life, wasting my energy on them is just ridiculous. It's amazing how much we can actually control our emotions when we don't allow the negativity in.

    Great post. :)

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    1. Thank you! I know I used to let things really get to me and wind up ruining my whole day. I'm working hard to be more conscious and focus on positive things - but also productive things. It's hard to make that choice though - we are human, after all.

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